The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given
 by the California Department of Transportation's driving school. 

  Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
  A: What for? He can't see my license plate.
 
  Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the
     same time?
  A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, 
     "Guns don't kill people. I do."
 
  Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car?
  A: Always wear a condom.
 
  Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
  A: Your car.
 
  Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
  A: Be too shit-faced to find your keys.
 
  Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
  A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
 
  Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive
     lawfully?
  A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
 
  Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
  A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.
 
  Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a
     flashing yellow traffic light?
  A: The color.
 
  Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
  A: Heavy psychedelics.
 
  Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
  A: Carry loaded weapons.

Remember, those are real answers given on driving exams from L.A.  The moral
of the story--don't move to L.A.